Developing Self Confidence

Confidence can be generally described as an ideal state of being certain whether your predictions are correct or not, or your chosen course of action is the best or most effective. It has also proven to be a vital ingredient when it comes to being
successful, either you are beginning, at the middle of a project or debate, or maybe you are about completing a particular task. The level of confidence you possess will determine how far and successful you will become.

Self-confidence is simply having the knowledge and understanding that you have a particular talent, charisma and strength in a particular area, believing that you are capable of executing any task given to you without any fear of failure or doubt. It is also the ability to understand what you can do and the desire to do it with excellence to the best of your satisfaction.

It is important to understand that real self confidence is not thinking that you are better than every-one else but knowing that there are some things you can do better than every-one else.

Lack of confidence is the major aim/reason for lack of implementation of good ideas as those without confidence may fail or not try because they lack it and those with it may succeed because they have it rather than because of a spontaneous ability.

Although some people believe that confidence has to do with a very big ego, but in actual fact, real self confidence is humble and focused. Anyone who possesses a real self confidence will do his or her job with excellence and not feel they have to broadcast it to everyone else. Excellence is always recognized anywhere and at anytime by those who knows it. Except you lack self confidence in yourself, you don’t have to point out what you have done to anybody. Just allow your excellence achievements speak.

Every success-minded people need to understand these descriptions about confidence and also know that the negative perspectives of confidence are not true. And in reality, real self confidence is not only a good practice or quality but also necessary for greater success. Without self confidence, we totally lack courage to move forward, try out new things and also test our limits; also lack of self confidence has lead to the mediocrity of so many leaders in the world today.

Now that we have a good understand of what confidence is and is not, let’s take a look at how we can develop our self confidence.

Building your self confidence:

In order to have a very good self confidence, there are several attribute that you need to posses and they will be discussed below

·         Know who you are

If you want to build your self-confidence, then you have to focus on improving your own life and becoming a better you, do not try to be like anyone else or even try to make your life more like your best friend's, your older brother's, or like those of the celebrities you see on television.  If you want to build up your confidence, then you need to know that there will always be someone who is prettier, knowledgeable, smarter, and richer than you, just like there will always be someone who is less attractive, less intelligent, and less wealthy than you are; all of this is irrelevant, just know that you are unique and this is the first step and what is relevant is caring about advancing your own goals and dreams.

·         Identify your talents

 Do not try to be like another person, either in your school, class, home or any where you find yourself. You should know that there is something which you are good at. This is so because everyone is gifted and good at something, so discover the things at which you are great at and that you can excel, and then focus on it and develop it as your talents. It is also a good practice to take some credit and pride in them but do not let it get to your head.

Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized. Express yourself, whether it's through art, music, writing, or dance. Find something you enjoy. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends

·        Think About Your Strengths

More to knowing who you are, identifying your talent, you should also think about your strength. You should understand who you are and also what you are capable of achieving within a particular period of time. This will go a long way in helping you either in school as a student and also out of school. Ensure you take a Look at your Achievement Log, and reflect on your recent life; think about what your friends would consider to be your strengths and weaknesses. From these, think about the opportunities and threats you face.

Make sure that you enjoy a few minutes reflecting on your strengths.

·        Preparation and Planning

Haven’t discovered what you can do and what you cannot do, the next important factor to consider is planning and preparation. When you plan and prepare yourself for the task ahead, you will always excel more and achieve greater goals than when you don’t. Sometime, people often feel less confident about new and potential situation and they run away from an opportunity which would have definitely brought them to lime light and this is because they failed to plan toward facing greater responsibilities.

If you are applying for a new job or expecting to write an exam for example, you would be wise to prepare well and plan towards the upcoming event, either by Planning on what you would want to say in the interview or prepare on how to answer a questions on the exam hall.

Planning involves practicing, rehearsing, and talking with your friends about how you would present your responses or answer.

There are many other examples of planning and preparation and this will always help you take control of unknown situations and the best you can do is to  break down tasks into smaller sub-tasks and plan as many as you can.

·        Take pride sometimes and enjoy your good qualities.

As an individual, we sometime just can’t avoid being proud of ourselves, especially when we achieve something great. This is a good quality as it can help you build lots of self confidence and esteem. More so, you should not only feel proud or great about your talents or your skills, but you should also think about the things that make your personality great. There are several personalities that you can possess which includes your sense of humor, your sense of compassion, your ability to listen keenly, or your ability to cope under stress. You may not think that there's anything about your personality worth admiring, but if you dig deep, you'll realize that you have plenty of admirable qualities. Whenever you feel bad about one of your weaknesses, comfort yourself by thinking about all of the positive qualities about yourself. You'll see that they far outweigh the things you are insecure about. Always ponder on the quality ones and write them down. You'll be on your way to building your self-confidence.

·        Bounce back from your mistake and adopt a more positive thinking

Always know that no one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in any of our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality. You should also learn that life is full of bumps and huddles as you progress. And that often these insecure feelings come and go, depending on where we are, who we are with, the mood we're in, or how we are feeling. In other words, they are not constant. If you've made a mistake, the best thing you can do is to recognize it, apologize, and make a game plan for avoiding it in the future.

Do not allow your one mistake make you believe or think you don't have what it takes to achieve your goals. Maybe you did not do well last time and your last result was not good enough as a student, this doesn't mean you're not capable of turning your act around and becoming one of the best in your class.

 Do not wallow in self-pity, or the pity and sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior — they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself put up positive and I can do it altitude, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others. By doing so, you reinforce those ideas in your mind and encourage your growth in a positive direction.

The act of confidence you put up on a thing will always determine how successful you can become on it. Never give up, even if you have tried before and failed does not mean you can’t succeed. Remember failure is only fulfilled you your life when you quit.

1/22/2015